Within just a week or two of their conversation, when Partha said "I can't live without you," Priyanjana was somewhat surprised but also pleased. That was the beginning. Then came countless daily messages, multiple phone calls, frequent meetings. Even hearing about ideal relationships and future plans from Rahul's mouth made her feel as if it were the script of a romantic movie! But that relationship didn't last long.
As soon as the initial intoxication of love wore off, everything seemed to change somehow. All those promises and assurances seemed to vanish into thin air. Priyanjana began to wonder whether such expressions of love were natural at all. Or was there some mistake on her part? It took her quite a few days to emerge from this confusion.
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Why does it feel so real?
The formal name for Priyanjana's experience is 'future faking'. The use of this term has recently increased in the fields of popular culture and psychology. The tendency of this behavior is to ignore the natural pace of relationships and engage in love bombing by talking about future-home-togetherness in such a way that the person on the other side believes they are especially important to the other person. But in reality, that's not the case. It's a kind of trap to overcome one's loneliness and make oneself 'special' to a partner.
But the problem is, it's difficult to identify this kind of trap at the beginning. Even more difficult is getting out of such toxic relationships. According to psychologists, this kind of love bombing at the beginning of relationships is not unusual. But it should remain limited to the present. Getting to know each other and listening to each other attentively is extremely important. Usually, when there's a difference between words and actions, the trap of 'future faking' gets exposed.
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Psychologists say that the purpose of 'future faking' is not deception; this behavioral tendency arises from a sense of insecurity in relationships. Therefore, it's important to clearly state personal boundaries from the beginning and take time to move forward. Healthy relationships have a balance. One person doesn't have to live according to the other's wishes alone. There's space for both, respect for each other, and opportunity to live according to one's own likes and dislikes. Both can express their individuality. Healthy relationships give time to know each other. They give time to make thoughtful decisions. 'Future faking' forces one to rush there.
